Friday, November 03, 2006

They're Gay, Stupid, or Both

Last week New Jersey decided that homosexuals have the the same domestic rights as the rest of us, which is great because now their former Republican governor (Tim McGreevey) can live the life he had been denying for so long. After the Foley scandal and now Ted Haggard, I'm beginning to wonder if all Republicans in government are just hiding the flames coming out of their asses - not that there's anything wrong with being gay, it's just nice if you admit to it (and stop trying to legislate against it). Soon instead of saying someone's "a little light in the loafers" we'll all say, "He's a little Republican." Additionally, why does anyone feel bad that these guys are having their personal lives brought into the campaign? Wouldn't it be better to ask why they're so insensitive to a topic or a group of people they're so familiar with?

In funnier news, Senator Mike DeWine (R-Ohio) said that an employee of his opponent, "unfortunately ate a banana laced with marijuana and had to go to the hospital." Seriously. That's what he said. This presents several problems. First, how, exactly, do you lace a banana with marijuana? My husband and I spent a good deal of time trying to figure that out. Second, why would you eat a banana that had already been peeled? Bananas are like condoms. When you see the wrapper, you pretty much assume that you're the first one to get there. Third, do you have any idea how much THC it would take to actually send someone to the hospital? The banana would have to be pure THC. It would keep you regular, but you'd forget where the bathroom was.

It seems to me that the Republicans (of all sexual orientations) are getting a little nervous about the election. Maybe it's because of these numbers:
Two thousand, eight hundred and twenty two US Soldiers won't be voting in next week's elections.
Twenty one thousand, four hundred and nineteen US soldiers have been wounded in Iraq
Possibly over six hundred thousand Iraqis killed
Does it have more impact if I SPELL IT OUT for you???

17 comments:

Cranky Yankee said...

Nice, I think it's funny that most of them running for office now won't say "Republican."

daveawayfromhome said...

I refuse to count chickens before they're hatched, too many close races, too many Republican dirty tricks, too many electronic voting machines.

Does anyone else think the Republican party is looking more and more like a bunch of pointy-haired bosses?

Anonymous said...

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
thats the best post ever.
thats great
only one stat you left out
the 3k the muslims killed in new york......
Some of us won't forget that, omit it or leave it out, ever

awesome post though.
js
can I order the laced banana's on ebay do you think?

United We Lay said...

Cranky,
My dad has always been a Republicn, but he's so embarrassed by the party and now its emerging ideals that he's crossed over to the Democrats.

Dave,
I don't believe we're going to win this election, and by we I mean the American people. I think the voting machines are riged - why else would there be no paper trail? I think many Democrats will stay home assumikng they have it in the bag, especially in inner city areas where it's a HUGE hassle to vote. PA is lucky because people WILL come out and support our governor. We'd love for him to run for Pres in 2008, but I think we need him here much more.

JS,
Really? You want to talk about the 3,000 people that were killed on the REPUBLICAN's watch. Okay, let's discuss the day they were so angry about that they they found bin Laden. Oh, wait... they didn't. Or the day they established a clear connection between bin Laden and Hussein. Oh, wait... that didn't happen either. Or the day that the mission was accomplished in Iraq 3 weeks after the war started, the majority of toops came home, and the Iraqi people lined the streets to throw flowers at our feet. Uh-oh... I think I missed that. You're right, maybe I will edit my post and include all of that very useful information.

Anonymous said...

I have a theory that the more conservative you are the more you repress those instincts as conservative is not a natural state of mind.

JS: your dig using the 3k that died at 11/9 doesn't make the 600,000 dead Iraqis any better, are we even now then?

BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

An individual's sexual orientation is not relevant to me...What is significant, however, is the hypocracy of this administration, exhibiting family values on the one hand (in theory) and not so in practice.

Anonymous said...

sure I would be glad to discuss the prior admin turning down UBL when he was offered, I know you will say that didnt happen, another sip of cool-aid. They admitted it 2 or 3 times I have heard the tape so much it makes me sick. UBL did say that when America had to fight it would quit because the libs would cry and moan like school children and we would pull out as evidenced by what happened in Somolia when we left like we were scared Cowards, whose watch was that on?
Why would Sandy Burgler steal confidential documents in the mists of the 9-11 commission? How can you blame bush for 9-11? That would be like blaming clinton for telling a bald faced lie on national TV about being blown by a fat ugly chick and every dumb assed cool-aid drinker in the US believing it. (oh my bad that did happen, those are the facts, sorry for using facts here) And the real die hard morons still following him.
There is one other number that you forgot 1.
Thats how many times any other country attacked us on Bushs watch. And you forgot the number 1 thats how many times we kicked their ass over it. And you forgot the number 2, thats how many time we were attacked under clinton and the number 0, the number of times he was man enough to defend us and the number 1 one more time, the number of times the Dems ran like scared bitches when clinton was in office, pulling out early, tsk tsk tsk.
there are the numbers
the facts hurt
js

Anonymous said...

DHG,
I havent a clue if you are even or not. I wish like hell we'd pull the troops from Iraq. Then anyone with a brain knows that country would spiral into a nasty civil war and then would be takin over by Iran. When this occures all of Europe would be threatened. Then about the only thing they could do would be beg the US to fight. Well France anyway would surrender and Iran could take them over too, no loss to the world there I don't guess.
The worst thing that could possibly happen to the peaceful people in Iraq would be for the US to pull out. I guess they were better off being raped tortured and slaughtered by their own leader. Remember the Kurds? Yeah Bush one saved them, I bet those in Somolia wish there had been a Bush in office huh?
600K have died there really? Thats alot. Thats damn near exactly how many died when the Republicans freed the slaves in America. Sometimes the right thing isnt the easiest thing.
think about it.
js

Cranky Yankee said...

JS - You could have taken a different tone in that post and made the same point. You don't like when we hurl insults at you and cry about when we do.

I would just like to point out that none of your fact are backed up by citation and one of them is patently wrong.

Sandy Berger did not steal classified documents. He stole copies of classified documents. He did it to get his story straight, not as you imply to cover anything up. Evidence Big difference in the way you are framing it. One could say that you are the cool aid drinker for regurgitating old worn out right wing talk radio lies.

And on technicality no country attacked our homeland on $hrubco's watch or Clinton's watch for that matter.

Anonymous said...

CY,
If I was out of the way i do apologize. I have learned from deam kerry kennedy and gore that being an ass never gets my point across. I havent a clue what was in Sandy burglers head when he put classified documents (or copies) in his panties. I didnt realize you knew him or could read his mind.
I do damn sure and absolutely agree with you that no COUNTRY attacked us, and I am damn proud that you are with me on this. If no country attacked us then it is obvois to anyone other than an idiot that anyone held in such an act does not deserve the honof the geneva conventions rules. Nor, obviously do they deserve any rules accorded by our constitution. I am tickled we see it the same way.
The attacks i referred to were of course the peaceful Cole bombing and the first WTC bombing. Again thank you for our agreement and I am sorry for calling it an attack by another country.
jsull

Cranky Yankee said...

Then you must also agree that only a fool would think we should have attacked Iraq rather than Saudi Arabia and imprisoned anyone with financial ties to Osama Bin Laden as material witnesses to terrorism. It must really eat away at anyone who is not living in a redneck world of self-loathing and denial that we let those same criminals occupy the highest office in our country rather than being denied them their Constitutional and Geneva convention rights. Only an idiot would not imprison the man who let our attacker's family members escape the day after he killed 3000 Americans in cold blood. Only a complete moron would defend this government after they were video taped holding hands with the man whose country funded the attack and supplied 15 of the 19 hijackers.

I'm glad we can agreed in such a pleasant way that only an idiot, complete fool or moron would not agree with the most bizarre extrapaltions and extreme views of situations present and historical as we do.

Anonymous said...

JS: you're aren't bringing facts, you're bringing idiocy to the plate, Jesus wept man, get a grip and read more books.

Cranky Yankee said...

We won!
Shamelessly plugging my latest post...

Anonymous said...

Well I guess now we will get to see if any of those things can be proved and we will also see if the Dems will do what they said they would that got them elected. Maybe the move the Dems made toward the middle (an excellent move and play for them) will light a fire under the reps tp work harder.
js

Anonymous said...

DHG,
no idiocy here. I do read books plenty of them. I don't read political books, stories or watch it on tv. I do though think about my positions from a right/wrong standpoint. I have to use morals and thought to arrive at my positions and try to have the position that helps the individuals greater good.
js

Cranky Yankee said...

Yee Haw...

Sandy Smith said...

Correction to original post:

Jim McGreevey was the Democratic Governor of New Jersey, having won the office on his second try after coming close to upending his Republican predecessor, Christine Todd Whitman, on his first try.

Not to take away from your basic point, but what made the whole McGreevey affair shameful was not homosexuality. That was a fig leaf he used to make a graceful exit out of a disgraceful abuse of power. Had the unqualified paramour he installed in a cushy state homeland-security job been of the opposite sex, it would have been just as bad.